Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Ready to make my life right.....again
As I sit here trying to motivate myself for this surgery, I look at my daughter and realize that I have to make it happen this time. I have ordered a new bodybugg, bought a tanning package to reward myself daily, and spent money on numerous books. I am scared of this surgery and the changes I will have to make. I am looking forward to letting my inner skinny girl out. I need this. I need to be able to play with my child as she grows, I need to be able to stand next to my husband and feel as though we are a good match (physically). I am ready to break this addiction I have to food. Yes, it is an addiction. When I eat lunch, I'm thinking about dinner. When I am getting ready for bed, I am wondering if I can fit another meal in. I am addicted to food and everything that involves it. I use it to celebrate, to mourn, to congratulate, and to relieve my stress. Like my friend once said, I am like a crack addict waiting for my next fix. I have to break up with food. I have to move on. This gastric bypass is my official goodbye. Its my two weeks notice. I will not spend the rest of my life caring more about food than I do my family....I refuse. My new life starts April 13, 2011- stay tuned to my new start on life, progress pictures, and me holding myself accountable- I WILL BE A SUCCESS!